Monday 3 June 2013

A Child's Dinner Party Meal. For One. Adult.

On the tube on the way home today a pregnant lady took an entire french stick from her rucksack and ate it.  All of it. No butter, no condiments.  Just an entire loaf of bread.  They can get away with anything can't they? "Can I have your seat?  I'm pregnant?"  Can I use your toilet?  I'm pregnant." "Can I eat an entire loaf of bread in one sitting?  I'm pregnant." You do whatever you need to do pregnant lady.

Anyway, tonight's meal is partially in honour of said pregnant lady and mostly is in honour of the fact that I can't cook.

It is a meal for a child.  For an adult.

My lovely little nieces eat anything, they're already so much more sophisticated than me.  Orla loves olives, Freya loves frankfurters (I don't think she does I just went with an alliteration thing after I said Orla and Olive, Orla really does love olives though, it wasn't all for show) but their meals tend to be quite basic.  Like mine. But this is because they're 1 and 3, not because they're "lazy, retarded and inept". Like me.

So tonight, inspired by lady with a bump and bread,  I bought myself some generic, no brand (warbuton's) "sandwich thins" -- they're a really nice level of bread, you're definitely eating bread but it doesn't overtake the filling which has been known to happen. Some well good cheese - extra mature, obvs. And some soup.

The super sleuths amongst you will have deduced that I had: A CHEESE SANDWICH WITH SOUP.

Mmmmm, basic meals are just the best.  The plainer the better, unless we're talking picnic and then it's a very lavish affair.

Although I did have some coleslaw already in the fridge (FYI I don't normally have stuff "in the fridge", this was left over from a lavish picnic that I had) and as an ode to the pregnant lady added some brown sauce.  They love all of that weird stuff don't they?  "Can I dip my gherkin in your ribena? I'm pregnant."




A Child's Dinner Party Meal. For One. Adult.  Or Ode to Pregnant Tube Lady

What you will Need

Generic sandwich thins (made by warburton's) - they're already cut in half, couldn't be easier.
Strong cheddar cheese
Coleslaw
Brown sauce
Soup - i had a tomato and lentil - fancy.

Recipe

1. hmm, not sure what I did first.
2. possibly put soup in a pan, yeah I think put soup in a pan.
3. open generic sandwich thin.
4. cut cheese
5. eat cheese
6. cut more cheese
7. put cheese on sandwich thin
8. should probably stir soup a bit, it's sticking to the bottom of the pan
 9. get coleslaw out of fridge
10. put coleslaw on sandwich
11. put brown sauce on sandwich
12. put soup in bowl.
13. put lid of sandwich thin on top of sandwich
14. eat over laptop.



Oh I forgot to mention, the brown sauce was out of date.  But only by a month.  That's probably fine, right?  I'm not sure who the brown sauce belongs to.  Possibly someone who moved out sometime ago. Probably the pyscho.  She was a laugh.

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